human logging technology

by Aizan Fahri

“I wanna see your nape. I need to connect my PC to the thunderbolt port so I can take a look at the logs”

biological usb and firewire

If you’re familiar with Linux troubleshooting, surely you know about reading a program’s log, let’s say log, when there’s a problem on your computer.

:: The ::

Typical Ubuntu Linux users don’t have to meddle with this thingy. For your information, is the display manager of your Linux-powered box. You see things running graphically on your Linux desktop, that’s what is doing behind the scene. Again, isn’t for mere mortals. It is for magician, like me.

If you’ve ever came across on custom-built Linux installation from scratch (for example, Arch Linux), is your best friend. If you can’t get it running, it’d be a comet Halley wish that you can play Angry Birds on the Google Chrome web browser. The best you can do without is to browse the text-version of a website (that’s a good pickup line to flirt, I’m telling ya from my experience).

You are likely to encounter faulty configuration when there’s a discrete graphic card on your board, and you have to install proprietary driver to run the UI. I had stumbled upon this problem, and I dump stools on my chair after hours of trying to fix it.

Technical things aside.

:: The log ::

“Dude, I can’t see any login menu. I installed LightDM, configured the and nVidia. What’s wrong?”

“Boot your machine, paste the log here.”

*checking the log*

“Fix the line 42. It should be commented”

BAM! The box was running again, rampantly. Needed no stethoscope, MRI or X-ray scanner. And how I wish we, puny human, got some logging system inside our body.

“Doctor, I was dumping liquified feces like machine gun. My toilet bowl wasn’t bulletproof.”

“Take a breath, I’m gonna check your breathing.”
“I’m gonna check your eyes now.”
“What did you eat last night?”
“Can I see your pants? Oh god it is Levi.”
“Where did you buy this underwear?”

Got it?


If everything can be logged in our body, split-second solution can be observed immediately. No need to turn someone into lab rat by prescribing inaccurate meds.

But, that’s it. What if, actually, our brain logs each and everything that’s going on inside our body.
And, how does it store the logs? It is accessible? How to access it?

Man! That’s genius!